I’m one of those people – Jack of all trades, master of none. I have something on the go 100% of the time. Leisurely activities for me include shampooing the carpets or running for the HCRG Board of Directors. Hubby has access to my Google Calendar to save us the trouble of “What’s the plan for tonight?” If I sleep in past 7am I feel like my day has been wasted.
There are pros and cons to living your life like this. I often hear that I’m spreading myself too thin. Skeptics will say that I can’t do EVERYTHING. I read about burning out, being fatigued, being too stressed – blah blah blah.
If you want your life to be amazing then stop listening to people who say you can’t and start paying attention to people who actually DO. Learning from people who have a life that you want is a better plan than talking to people who don’t.
(side note: I’m not saying that you SHOULD try to do it all. If having a lot of relax time is what you want, then I say go for it! This post is for people who want to do it all but are stressed out about it.)
1) Determine if you are doing all of these things because you can’t say “no”.
I say “no” all the time. Sometimes it’s because there are just not enough hours in the day. Most of the time it’s because I don’t have an interest in whatever was presented to me. Are you saying “yes” just because you don’t want to miss out on something or you fear disappointing that person? Get over it.
Your happiness is dependent on pleasing one person – yourself. Once you realize that then you’ll have conviction when you say yes to things and enjoy doing whatever it is that much more.
I also advise in giving a clear Yes or No, stay away from Maybe. Maybe means “almost yes” to everything and then your calendar will be over run with stuff you half-committed to. You’ll also likely forget to respond to the person you said “I’ll get back to you on that” and they will think you are a flake. So, if you do actually HAVE to get back to someone, then put a date in your calendar to remind yourself to get back to them.
2) Be okay with not being perfect
This is something that everyone should follow. Being a perfectionist is nothing to be proud about; it’s actually really unhealthy and way too stressful. The focus of being “number one” is unattainable – there is always going to be someone better than you. Don’t even focus on being YOUR best, as that can be challenging and frustrating when you realize you’re not doing your best.
Instead, focus on smaller goals. For example, instead of saying “I want to be the best roller derby girl out there,” I say “I want to knock three people down today.” Then, at practice, I focus on my hits and trying hard to knock people down. I know some girls that just love to get hit. Whatever it is that makes you happy, focus on doing that over and over again.
3) Realize that it’s unlikely that you are REALLY good at one thing.
Sometimes I am envious of those people that have crazy natural talent at one thing and it’s all they live, breathe and sleep. It’s all they want to do and they surround themselves with it all. Then I get a smack of reality and how awesome it is to try all these different things. I love that my life is not consumed by just one thing. I also like the pressure of not having to be the absolute best (which is impossible) and I actually enjoy whatever I am doing.
4) But if you HAD to pick one thing, it would be….?
I get irritated when I have to choose between things (for example, when something gets in the way of derby). Of all the activities in my life, I do prioritize. That way, when I do have to choose, I can easily pick what wins (If you are curious, it’s spending time with Hubby, because that is very rare, and Derby).
Are you a “do it all” type of person? What kinds of reality check and tips can you share that have helped you along the way? Please share them in the comments!